To tell you the truth, the last few months have felt pretty chaotic. A lot has happened in my personal life - a new job, changes in my living situation, mental health highs and extreme lows with multiple hospital visits in between.
On the plus side, progress is being made with my endo. Back in June, I had the contraceptive implant fitted in the hopes of it controlling my hormones and reducing my chronic pain. Much to my surprise, it has actually helped a great deal.
I'll admit, it took my body a good three months to adjust to it, and those three months were a nightmare. I suffered extreme mood swings, major bloating, random spotting and super heavy periods that lasted for - I shit you not - fourteen days; not to mention a serious flare up at the beginning of August to top it all off.
Thankfully, once September rolled around, my chronic pelvic pain began to reduce significantly, which was fucking awesome. However, something the implant didn't seem to help with was the pain I frequently experience during intercourse.
(Spoiler alert: it's about to get TMI all up in here.)
It's sad but true. Pain during sex is one of the most common symptoms that endo sufferers experience. Allow me to paint you a picture...
Imagine a penis - your boyfriend/husband's, Tom Hardy's, whoever's. Now, imagine that penis is a red hot fire poker, stabbing you repeatedly in the Holiest of Holies. That's the sensation that I, and many others, have to deal with and believe me when I say it's just as unpleasant as it sounds.
As I'm sure you can guess, my libido borders on non-existent when this is all I have to look forward to. Luckily I have a wonderful, supportive boyfriend who understands and doesn't mind not getting his rocks off 24/7.
Pro-tip: if you ever feel the need to abstain from sex for a while due to how painful it is and your partner isn't 100% understanding - drop their ass like a hot potato. YOU DESERVE BETTER. Ain't nobody got time for this "but what about me and my needs?!" cry-baby bullshit.
Anyway, with that all being said, I mentioned the extreme pain and discomfort to my gynecologist and after a rather uncomfortable physical exam, she concluded that I may have what's called 'rectovaginal endometriosis'. This is when the endometrial tissue has began to penetrate and grow deep into the vagina, surrounding the cervix as well as the tissue that lies between the vagina and rectum. Yikes.
She then referred me for a pelvic MRI scan so they could get a better look at my insides. I went for said MRI two weeks ago. I spent 45 minutes lying in a claustrophobic tube with headphones on that were essentially pointless because the machine was so loud it tuned out nearly every song that played on the radio.
I remember I did get to hear five second snippets of Toto's "Africa" and Lionel Richie's "All Night Long" in between the intermittent banging and whirring noises though, so that was nice.
Right now I'm still waiting on the MRI results. Depending on how far the endometrial tissue has spread will conclude whether or not I need to be referred for surgery again, so I'm sort of dreading hearing back from my doctor.
September marked two years since my first laparoscopy and official endo diagnosis. The surgery and eight weeks of recovery time that followed aren't exactly some of my fondest memories, so you can imagine why I'm not looking forward to possibly having to go through that again.
On the bright side, being hooked up to a morphine drip is always great craic. Being rectally administered pain relief, though? Minus craic.
Anyway, that pretty much brings us up to speed. Considering my lack of commitment to blogging, I guarantee the next time I post here will be sometime in the new year, granted I don't get hit by a bus or fall down a well.
Have a lovely Christmas!
Kiera xo.
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